2008. január 6., vasárnap

Goldpants - English

Dedicated to Wayne Nagin, Lobo, M. Basheer, to the loving memory of Mr. Bill Bray and to all those, whose name we don't know

They were on tour again. A couple of shows were already behind their backs, but the singer still wanted to perfect some bits and pieces – business as usual. As the bodyguards could not do else but take each day as it comes and even thought most of them were bored to death, they still tried their best to look at least somewhat interested. Work was less stressed, in the safety of a hotel suite, no one else around but the make-up artist, wardrobe designer, the world-famous-entertainer and his „bloodhounds” his guards. The world famous entertainer widely known for his slight obsession with perfectism: their client. He wasn’t even angry, that will happen afterwards, when the stage director comes in for the meeting, that surely will be a show on its own. Only one guard was honestly eager to pay attention, the new-be. He wasn’t yet used to life around here. „Footsteps of divine perfection”, no one could have ever gone below 100% performance. Neither the management team neither all the others nor himself, he demanded the most from himself. The new boy has already survived the baptism, his first concert. Wayne couldn’t help laughing remembering that evening.

Boss ran off stage like a maniac:
- Crap. It was crap as it is. Settings need changing. Lights need adjusting. Why on earth does it take so long to get changed? Half of the audience walks home by the time I get on stage after the interlude. The stage floor fittings are loose.

All this after the audience went frantic, girls screamed and fainted. The Hungarian guy whispered to his workmate
-Is he having a bad day?
-No, we are just on tour, you know. The usual. He was almost happy with how things went tonight. You will notice when he is not. Then we will stay on to do a repeat.
-A repeat? To rehearse what went wrong?
-Not. The whole.
The new be almost dropped his jar, his collegeaues laughed at his astonishment, the boss was a safe distance away in his dressing room.

This time around Wayne didn’t want to risk a thing. Even thought it is only a session on outfits, it is still better not to make a comment, it might light the spark.

-Michael – turned the singer to the designer who was already alarmed and worried what idea his client had on his mind again that he would need to translate to an outfit.
-So, Michael what if …what if we were to tighten a bit on this pair of trousers?
-The one we use for Billie Jean? Sure, It is indeed a bit loose I guess, but in fact if you were eating a bit more I wouldn’t have to change it from time to time…
-Not that one. I thought of the golden one.

The make up partist – she was around just listening in- started to caugh. The bodyguards looked at each other, the designer raised his eyes towards heaven. Their client is not normal. That’s for sure, now.

- If I tighten it with the turn of a hair, it will rip off of you in the middle of the show, just do one swift move…
- OK, then only with half of it…I wanna give to my fans.

The newbe surpresed a hiccup. Give? Rather take…blow their mind away.
-Look boss,- the desinger tried to negotiate- I don’t even know how you get those trousers on. You could go on stage in briefs ’cos those pants show more than they are supposed to hide. You ask for the impossible.

-Ati! Sorry, I do apologise, I still can not properly prounce your name. So, what do you think? Isn’t this too closed?

Oh, that was a trap indeed. Whatever he answers it will not turn out to be fine. The others will laugh at him for weeks to come. A YANA girl might save him, last night’s one was a tough one too. And the boss wants to show more of himself. Oh dear, that will be fine….They let the girls in, then change the signs on the stadium: Mental Institue. Ok, he will try his best to remain on the topic and regain his diplomatic sense.

-I am sure you all know it better than myself. But if you would still consider a non-experts opinion I would not recommend changing it until the tour passed Budapest. Or if any, loosen it.
- Why? Don’t you like the idea? Or..is it against somekindof a law in Hungary?..
- No, well it is not. But I know what the Hungarian girls are like.
-May be I should get to know them a lot better, shouldn’t I?

OMG, why did I take on this assignment. And on the top of it all his mobile rang. Mike noticed the ring but waved him, OK to leave to answer it, there are plenty of people in the suite.
- Neverthless no-one besides him speak a single word Hungarian…...
- Hi, closed facility? … No…it is not that bad …It is OK, it is just this touring…sorry I gotta go.

OMG, what the heck his client is doing again? He jumps right there with Wayne. OK, it is not a bad idea to let some air into the room, but the downstairs chorus starts off again and of course he can’t leave a cheer unanswered. He leans out of the window...he’s half-way out…
- Can’t we go down….

Of course, what do ya think..Of course not! Better to keep quiet, Wayne might be able to talk this madness out of his head right now.

The phone rings
- Boss, the band has arrived.
- Well…then at an other time. And the tailor session is over too .

Thank Lord, this time they got away with it. Ideas he has….just stopping by for a chat with 2000 of his mad fans, why doesn’t he wants to go to the bull run at Pamplona, that would be a lot safer I guess.

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